Suksy's Pensieve

Kauffman's Paradox of the Corporation : " The less important you are to the corporation, the more your tardiness or absence is noticed ." The Salary Axiom : " The pay raise is just large enough to increase your taxes, just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay." Miller's Law of Insurance : " An insurance policy covers everything except what happens." Isaac's Strange rule of Staleness : " Any food that starts out hard will soften when stale. Any food that starts out soft will harden when stale. " Last but not the least.....applicable to most of us.... Lampner's Law of Employment : " When leaving work late, you will go unnoticed. When leaving work early, you will meet the boss in the car park. "

An award should go to the gate attendant at Luqa airport. A crowded Malta-London flight was cancelled. She was the lone attendant in charge of re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it HAS to be FIRST CLASS". The attendant replied, "I'm sorry sir. I'll be happy to try to help you, but I've got to help these people first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out." The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers behind him could hear, "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO I AM?" Without hesitating, the attendant smiled and grabbed her public address microphone: May I have your attention please? May I have your attention please?" she began. With her voice being heard clearly throughout the terminal, she said, "We have a passenger here at Gate 14 WHO DOE...

Law -1: Every Engineer continues his state of chatting or forwarding mails unless he is assigned work by external unbalanced manager. Law -2 : The rate of change in the Work is directly proportional to the payment received from client and takes place at the quick rate when deadline force is applied. Law -3 : For every appraisal there is an equal but opposite Work Implementation. Bonus Law -4 : Mistakes can neither be created nor be removed from drawings by an Engineer. It can only be converted from one form to another. The total number of mistakes in the drawing always remains constant